It’s Not You, It’s Moshe

Today’s episode is a Shabbat Replay of our service on August 16th when Rabbi Steven delivered a drash on Deuteronomy. Moses is just not that into us, and he’s written us a whole book detailing how we messed up our chances with the most eligible prophet in the land. What lessons can we learn from this retelling of Israel’s relationship with Moses and God?

This sermon features a lot of audience participation, and we’ve done our best to retain what we can of Mishkanites’ responses while cutting out what the microphone couldn’t sufficiently pick up. The sound quality was, well, breaking up.

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Produced by Mishkan Chicago. Music composed, produced, and performed by Kalman Strauss.

Transcript

Transcript

Hello and welcome to Contact Chai. Today’s episode is a Shabbat Replay of our service on August 16th when Rabbi Steven delivered a drash on Deuteronomy. Moses is just not that into us, and he’s written us a whole book detailing how we messed up our chances with the most eligible prophet in the land. What lessons can we learn from this retelling of Israel’s relationship with Moses and God? This sermon features a lot of audience participation, and we’ve done our best to retain what we can of Mishkanites’ responses while cutting out what the microphone couldn’t sufficiently pick up. The sound quality was, well, breaking up.

High Holiday registration is now open to Builders, so if you have yet to renew — or join — now is your chance to get in before General Admission tickets open this Wednesday, August 20th. Save your seats and claim your steep Builder discount today!

And now, take it away, Rabbi.

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They say hindsight is 20/20. But what we really mean by this adage is that, when looking back at the events leading up to a painful experience, people create stories to explain what happened. It's how we make sense of the world. I recently came across a (rather old) article about how people handle breakups, or really — why some people struggle to move past them. Researchers found two primary responses. Those who had a hard time moving on felt that the breakup proved that there was some fundamental flaw in them. They looked back on everything that happened before their breakup as signs that there was something wrong with them. Those who were able to pick up the pieces and move forward saw the breakup as external to their person; of course, when looking back at the arc of their relationship they saw how they contributed to (and sometimes caused) the dissolution of their relationship, but whatever mistakes were made gave them an opportunity to learn — and to grow. It is clear that the stories we tell about our past shape how we face the future. For the person who looked back and saw an indictment of their character, who told the story that they were inherently unlovable, looked forward without hope for companionship (regardless of whether this was true or not). For the person who found purpose in the wins and failures of the past, some kind of lesson to be learned (however hard earned that lesson may have been), saw possibility in tomorrow — and felt capable to meet whatever it held for them.

In a sense, the Book of Deuteronomy is a (very long) breakup letter. It contains Moses’ speech to the Israelites before they cross the Jordan River and enter the land of Israel, leaving him behind on the other shore. He recounts all the events that led them to this moment, standing at the end of a forty year journey of wandering, of hardship, and of violence. He says:

Remember the long way that God made you travel in the wilderness these past forty years, in order to test you by hardships to learn what was in your hearts: whether you would keep the divine commandments or not. God subjected you to the hardship of hunger and then gave you manna to eat, which neither you nor your ancestors had ever known, in order to teach you that a human being does not live on bread alone, but that one may live on anything that God decrees. The clothes upon you did not wear out, nor did your feet swell these forty years. Bear in mind that God disciplines you just as a parent disciplines their child. Therefore keep the commandments: walk in God’s ways and show reverence.For God is bringing you into a good land, a land with streams and springs and fountains issuing from plain and hill; a land of wheat and barley, of vines, figs, and pomegranates, a land of olive trees and honey; a land where you may eat food without stint, where you will lack nothing; a land whose rocks are iron and from whose hills you can mine copper.When you have eaten your fill, give thanks to God for the good land given to you. Take care lest you forget God and fail to keep the divine commandments, rules, and laws which I enjoin upon you today. When you have eaten your fill, and have built fine houses to live in, and your herds and flocks have multiplied, and your silver and gold have increased, and everything you own has prospered, beware lest your heart grow haughty and you forget God —who freed you from the land of Egypt, the house of bondage; who led you through the great and terrible wilderness with its serpents and scorpions, a parched land with no water in it, who brought forth water for you from the flinty rock; who fed you in the wilderness with manna, which your ancestors had never known, in order to test you by hardships only to benefit you in the end.Lest you say to yourselves, “My own power and the might of my own hand have won this wealth for me.” Remember that it is God who gives you power and abundance, in fulfillment of the covenant made on oath with your ancestors.

So this is not exactly how I remember the story. The forty years wandering in the desert were deeply unpleasant (or at least, the Israelites complained enough to make it clear that they did not see any kind of purpose for their suffering). There was violence and death. An entire generation was lost, due to the mistakes they made. It was never clear that they would make it to their destination. Yet Moses, looking back on all of these events, creates a cohesive narrative that explains why all of this happened to them. It was a test. And one that they passed. But not because of their own power, but that of God. Like a parent caring for a child, sometimes with tough love — but with love, nonetheless, God helped them reach their destination. And this history, it has a lesson: that even when they have come into abundance, when they have built their homes, and their flocks have grown, and their coffers have filled, and everything they have has prospered — that they should adopt a posture of humility, remembering that they were once slaves in Egypt. The story they tell about the past shaped how they move forward.

https://youtu.be/kwxeV8-8j6k

In a week, we end the month of Av and begin the month of Elul. Elul starts the countdown to the High Holidays, and is seen as a time for taking stock of the past year and setting intentions for the year to come. We’re not quite in that period yet. But the month of Av also has us look to the past, and the history of our people. During this month we observe two holy days: Tisha b’Av and Tu b’Av. More people might be familiar with the former holiday. It is a day when we remember the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem, and the accumulated tragedies that have befallen our people since then. Reading through the litany of terrible events, it would be easy to tell a story of victimhood. And the fact of the matter is, we have often been on the receiving end of unprovoked violence. But this is not the story that the rabbis tell.

Looking at the generation who lived through the destruction of the Temple, the rabbis ask: why did this happen, given that they were maintaining all of God’s commandments? They studied Torah. They did all the mitzvot. Didn’t God promise, just like we read in Deuteronomy, that if we kept faith everything would be okay? The answer they give is sinat chinam, baseless hatred that tore apart their communities and pitted neighbor against neighbor. So terrible are the effects of hatred that the rabbis say they must be equivalent to our three worst transgressions: idolatry, sexual violence, and murder.

By taking an active role in the events leading up to the destruction of the Temple, the rabbis teach that we are not merely victims of the past. We have agency, to shape our future for better and for worse.

Which is why the next holiday of this month is so important. Tu b’Av is a celebration of love. Rabbi Shimon ben Gamliel taught that it is one of the two most joyous days on our calendar, when people would wear white and wander into the fields to find their beloved. The tradition was to borrow clothes from each other, so that no one would be embarrassed by the quality of their garments — everyone would mix and match, so that each person could walk with dignity. Just as we have the capacity for hate, our history also reminds us that we have an incredible reservoir of care and compassion. In this way, Tu b’Av becomes a rejoinder for Tisha b’Av.

So Rabbi Shimon ben Gamliel said that Tu b’Av is one of two most joyous days in our calendar. What is the other one? Yom Kippur. Which might seem like an odd choice, because it is after all a very serious day — but I believe it is one of serious joy. Because Yom Kippur teaches us that we are not trapped by the past. Rather, through the process of teshuvah — of reflection, repair, and reorientation – the past can be something we learn from to change how we might face the future.

In this way, as Tisha b’Av leads to Tu b’Av leads to the High Holidays, the lessons of Av presage the work of Elul — the stories we tell about our past, and therefore the stories we tell about ourselves, matter.

So what is the story you are going to tell about this past year? In your achievements, do you see happenstance or do you recognize your hard work? In your heartbreak, do you find despair or can you see the strength and resilience it took for you to carry it? In your mistakes, have you made excuses for why they happened or will you take responsibility for your part in them — and in taking responsibility, understand that you also have the incredible power to repair what was broken? Will you listen to the voices that said you are not enough (maybe one of those voices was your own), or will you pay attention to the people who reminded you that you are someone worthy of love, care, and compassion (including the voices of this tradition, which remind us on our lowest days that we are always *always* beings of inherent worth and dignity)?

It is not the facts of the story that change. Especially for those of us who moved through hardship, it does not abrogate the fact that we faced difficulty. But we can change how we tell the story — to remind ourselves that we have the capacity to grow and to change, and it is precisely that ability that enables us to meet whatever lies ahead in 5786.